All I can say is Alhamdulillah. The another is Thank You. April 25th 2015 was a big day for me. It was my graduation day. Many thanks to Allah SWT Almighty, to always strengthen me till the day I took the oath as an educated person. Allah would never ease my way without many pray and wishing from people around me, and I would never tough without strong person beside me. Here exclusively I write a post to say thank you for each person who helped me (us) directly or indirectly.

- My (our) parents -- Alm. Abah and Ibu -- Bapak and Ibu (Zulfa's) 
Thank you for your everlasting pray, blessing, and trust. Our whole world owe you. 

- Family 
For family, sisters and brothers, faraway siblings who always pray for me (us) and everlasting support.

- Bapak Thomas Agung 
For always supporting and convincing us from the very first time we tried till the end. To reassure that we could do that, to trust us. 

- Bapak Sarono and Bapak Helmy 
Our adviser, thank you for your time, your knowledge, your courage, your solution. 

- Lectures
To always calm us down and said that everything will ran perfectly, to always remind us to keep trying and pray. 

- Friends! 
Zulfa! My partner! If you read this someday, I just want you to know that you are more than my partner all these time. You are my mentor since high school who patiently taught me some subject I didn't understand, encourage me, support my decisions. My sister who gave me advise, and more than everything. Even though, sometimes we disagree and be at cross purpose, but still we could find the way to say yes and moved forward. You are part of my current successfulness, and I owe you everything. 

Lucy, Tia, Cita, Meta who always support me with their own way. Thaaaaaanks a lot to my dear Lucy who taught me how to arrange database for the first time since I was blind about that. Thank to you and Meta for spending your time and attended to my graduation party. 

Mas Fadly and Danang! My Informatika lads! I owe you guys! Every encourage from Mas Fadly was strengthen me, every theory from Danang could open my mind to try and try again. 

Dimas; neighbor man! Thanks for the short course about CSS. I owe you hahaha

Sidiq : High school friend. Man, thank you for help, your last minute solution H-1 before final project defense. That was hot hot pop! You should know that we solved the problem via whatsapp! Semarang Bandung only for resolving the wrong PHP syntax LOL. Thaaaank you, Man! 

Mega Elinda and Ucup; you guys are I don't know. You helped us a lot with your intelligence hahahahaha but yes you indeed helped us a lot with yout PHP language on your brain. 

PT INTI Bandung and all the hospitality! The people, the opportunity. Pak Rachmat, Pak Parmono, and Mas Esa. You guys are stranger that came into our life and became a part of our successfulness, Thank you. And of course Bandung! The city I didn't frequently visited before. Thanks for the whole story, thanks for not being so rude to us. Can't wait to meet you very soon, someday. InsyaAllah. 

TKC ; Thank you for being you, thank you for every support. You are the part of my college memories. 

PECC mates : One word "LOVABLE!" Thank you for the flowers and your attendance. 

And all of those guys who I couldn't mention one by one, name by name, whoever who helped me (us) - God notice that, barakallah! :) 

Some of you may think that this post is quite tacky, but I need to write this, separately from my another social network such as Path or Instagram to say thank you. Their help are my weapon, and all I can give is this post. I hope you know that their help are always meaningful. I am such a lucky because I always surrounded by encourage people. Support, pray, wish, help, and every little thing always strengthen. 

Wish me luck for another year! 

Thanks to Allah that I'm officially graduated soon as I received the invitation of graduation party this Saturday. This moment is something that I've been waiting for even since the first day of college "Well, I have to graduate right in 2,5 years from now" and I did it. Thanks to my partner for doing final project as we passed all those hard times (Semarang-Bandung routines, you remember?) even since the first time arranged the proposal; we did it and I'll never do this without you.  

With a straightforward mind, I was thinking that I would spend my 'free-time' after the final project session until the graduation party with heart full of happiness. I have to! I deserve; like free-bird "I'm gonna bake this, make this, cook this, try this, try this places, hanging out, pay all those times I didn't spent with friends, blablablabla". 
Yes I did it for about 2 weeks after I passed officially. I even try my luck on a mini project focused on interior design called RAWZ (please take a visit @rawzproject) which is one of my dream that had to be postponed during my busy-crazy-college-times already checked. But then I forgot to spread my wings into the professional occupation. I'm a job-seeker. It slaps me when I realized that some of my closest friends are settled in some company. I'm freeze. I'm happy for them of course! I just confuse to myself. Why I didn't try? Then, yeah! Those happiness and 'free-bird' things somehow has vaporized just like that. It's struggling time. Paper, envelope, and this and that. From all of soooo many job vacancies I have applied, there are few positions and companies that I've been dreaming of to be able to be part of it. The first company may not that huge. In size, it is small actually - but the customers mostly are from US citizen. The background is just like what I love; Arts and Illustrator and they said no need to have an experiences on drawing or something whatever-you-name-it. But then, I was failed. The second one is quite big in size and you MUST know this company. The background is broadcasting media. The position? something that related to creativity. And I think I'm also failed this time (though I would like to say that I still have a chance *but I'm not so sure*)

Picture source here

Let me analyze. My background? Engineering. My objectives? (at least for now) are not from engineering. I just want to follow my heart. I just want to listen the voices that I've been ignored since I don't know when, to give my heart a chance in deciding. Well, I'm not that insane. My priorities are two; I have to work in a BIG company OR I have to work in place where my soul could be happy even under the crazy pressure/deadlines. Just so you know, I cried when I failed on the first job, and I cried so many times wishing for a chance that God given to me in the second job I've applied. 

If I cannot work in a BIG company, at least I have to work in my second priority. But again, it always haunted by another truth and all-those-realistic-things in life (you say it!). I may not alone, but our basic problem each are different I'm sure. I'm not (always) that strong person, I'm quite fragile to be honest but I act that I'm not. Yes I'm fine, but I'm not that fine. My heart, my mind, the way I thought. But I always put a believe in Allah. I pray that Allah could bless my priority for the sake of Allah and people who loves me. I just want to live my life, for the last time till I close my eyes. Maybe I'm just too naive. My sister said that I even haven't start it yet. Well, I don't where's the point of 'start' or when I have to start. I don't want to start in that point wherever it is, I want to start far before that starting point because I'm afraid. Yes I'm just afraid. I'm afraid that I'm late. 

Just afraid.
Please listen.

O, Allah. I miss my Abah.