GOT UNFOLLOWED? #RepostEntry

by - 4:49 PM


This entry is originally from Cinta Ruhama Amelz - one of another inspiring blogger in Indonesia. I like the way she think about live nowadays and how social media controls our mind and personality, unconsciously (even I myself feels that way). I'd like to post this entry because, I just felt exactly the same with Kak Tara's entry below. It also happened to me. Enjoy!


today, i'd like to pour some thoughts of mine about social media. i find it's pretty surprising how some people deal with social media, especially about their perception on following, unfollowing, befriending and unsharing. i mean, have you ever got bullied for unfollowing someone on social media?  well, this post is kinda inspired by that experience which i've been through.

a long time ago, this person i know left an awkward comment on a photo of her and me that she uploaded on Instagram. this person is someone i had met by coincidence for a few times and i had sent a message one time telling her that i missed her and that i'd like to hang out with her - because i felt that she'd make a good friend after the nice conversations we had. i thought that is one of the things i can do when i want to be friends with someone. anyway, she mentioned me in that comment that sounded like this, "as i remember, you followed me first. i just realized that you unfollowed me." so i replied this person's comment under the same photo saying that, "it's only Instagram. it's not like we're not friends anymore." with a smiley emoticon at the end of the comment, because i'm friendly like that. i was surprised that she replied like this, "i guess we have a different perception about friendship."

WOW.

when i read the first comment from her, i paused and thought, is it such a wrong thing to unfollow someone on Instagram after you follow them first? i really don't think there is anything wrong with that. to me, Instagram is a tool to express myself, promote my blog, a source of inspirations and an entertainment for my artistic visual loving eyes. it has absolutely nothing, i repeat, nothing to do with how i state someone's status in my life. i follow accounts on Instagram simply because i'm interested and heart the photos simply because they look great to me. but when i find the photos are no longer interesting nor inspiring, i might unfollow. to me, unfollowing on Instagram or Twitter as well as unsharing on Path does not mean i don't want anything to do in real life with the owner of the account, neither mean i'm ending the friendship with him or her.

i just think there is a big misunderstanding right here. to her, it seemed that we have a different perception about friendship. to me, it seemed that the different perception is about Instagram and i did tried to explain to her about this in the most polite way as possible, but the response was negative and she blocked me on Instagram. since then, i never hear anything from her again nor meet her, but i hope she's doing great.

i really can't blame any person for thinking that one of the requirements to be friends with someone is by following them on Instagram because people are free to have their own perception of friendship or social media. but in my opinion, that way of thinking is immature, shallow and silly. i myself have my own rules with the way i use my social media - i treat my Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and Path differently - and if they don't like that they are free to unfollow or unfriend me and i can just chill about it. my Facebook is open to people who wants to get connected with me, i allow anyone to follow my Instagram and Twitter (though that doesn't mean i'm going to follow back), but i'm more picky when it comes to choosing people to connect with on Path because there are things that i'm not comfortable to share with or being shared by others on a Path timeline. even on Twitter and Instagram there are a lot of things from my life that i don't share because i'm not ready or just don't want to. but whether i'm connected to someone through social media or not, showing the eagerness to be friends, respect and being nice to them is a mandatory as long as they treat me the same way.

so really, following, unfollowing, befriending and unsharing on social media is not a big deal for me, but how people question about them is. just like i wouldn't ask anyone, i would rather people not ask me - joking or seriously, "why are you not following me back on Instagram (or Twitter)?" or, "why are you not friends with me on Path?" other than because the answer wouldn't be that easy to spell out (is there any reason that can sound positive for questions like these?), i think the decision on being connected or not to someone on social media is very personal and the reason behind it is not always related with whether one considers someone as his or her friend (or family) or not. i mean, are you ready if the answer is, "because your social media posts suck."? for me, i don't really need to hear that kind of answer, that's why i don't ask. LOL. oh, and something to remember, that unfollow and unshare button is kinda easy to get clicked by accident, so don't let the negative thoughts get you.

i'm writing this post to encourage you, the readers, to be more open-minded when it comes to accepting others' decision to get connected or not with you on social media. i have no intention to offend anyone with this post for i am a person who loves peace.

how about you? do you have thoughts about social media that you'd like to share?


One thing I've been learning from Social Media is; it's totally different with real life. Friendship ended is not determine by clicking unfollow button on social media. Friends in persons are totally different with friends on social media. Your social media is your right. I'm trying to explain myself that do not use your hard-feeling on it. I'm trying to let my social media as my entertainment. Don't get me wrong, the reason why I keep asking to follow back on twitter or instagram is just for keeping contact with my old friends, but if they aren't willing to do that it's just all okay for me. I admitted on Facebook era, when this social media was soooo hype, I invited everyone (including stranger person faraway from my place) and my friends was reaching 2000 back then or maybe growing till now. The more number of your friends, the cooler you were. But not now. I've change my perception about that bold line I typed. The number of friends/follower doesn't matter anyway. as Kak Tara said "... I follow accounts on Instagram simply because i'm interested and heart the photos simply because they look great to me. but when i find the photos are no longer interesting nor inspiring, i might unfollow. to me, unfollowing on Instagram or Twitter as well as unsharing on Path does not mean i don't want anything to do in real life with the owner of the account, neither mean i'm ending the friendship with him or her." 

Just like the way I think. 

*pssst but sometime I can't refuse for not keep following people I don't want to follow. It's about hospitality, and I respect that. Maybe they just need more time to learn :) 

 

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